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	<title>Precious Women&#187; Relationships</title>
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		<title>Life Solution Series on Relationships: Healthy Relationships</title>
		<link>http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/life-solution-series-on-relationships-healthy-relationships/</link>
		<comments>http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/life-solution-series-on-relationships-healthy-relationships/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 04 Jun 2010 20:00:16 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Christianity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Relationships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self Care]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[single women]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[healthy family characteristics]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.iamlovable.com/?p=642</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[ healthy family has three common characteristics.  These characteristics describe the atmosphere as well as what goes on in a healthy family.  In one sense, these things describe in broadest possible terms how family members feel and how they treat each other.

The characteristics present in happy and healthy families are positive identities, deep affection, and happiness skills.  The last two appear to be perfectly obvious, but the first takes some explaining.  In fact, another Life Solutions article deals with identity (Identity and Relationships).  We will first talk about what these things mean in simplest terms.
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<td width="550" valign="top"><img src="http://www.whatgodintended.com/content/images/relationship-healthy.jpg" border="0" alt="" width="540" height="65" /><strong><span style="color: #008000; font-size: small;"><br />
<img src="http://www.whatgodintended.com/content/images/a.gif" border="0" alt="" width="38" height="48" align="left" /></span></strong><span style="font-size: x-small;"> healthy family has three common characteristics.  These characteristics describe the atmosphere as well as what goes on in a healthy family.  In one sense, these things describe in broadest possible terms how family members feel and how they treat each other.</span><span style="color: #008000; font-size: small;"><strong>T</strong></span><span style="font-size: x-small;">he characteristics present in happy and healthy families are <strong>positive identities</strong>, <strong>deep affection</strong>, and <strong>happiness skills</strong>.  The last two appear to be perfectly obvious, but the first takes some explaining.  In fact, another Life Solutions article deals with identity (<span style="color: #008080;"><strong><em>Identity and Relationships</em></strong></span>).  We will first talk about what these things mean in simplest terms.</span></p>
<p><strong><span style="color: #008000;">Positive Identities</span></strong></p>
<p><span style="color: #008000; font-size: small;"><strong>A</strong></span><span style="font-size: x-small;">ll of us carry around in our hearts an instinctive picture of ourselves.  The picture we have of ourselves developed while we were growing up.  Thus, it is very difficult to change in adulthood.  The effect of this instinctive picture is immense.</span></p>
<p><span style="color: #008000; font-size: small;"><strong>I</strong></span><span style="font-size: x-small;">n our growing up years, we related to the family members about us.  Over and over again our parents and our sisters and brothers described how they saw us and what they saw inside of us.  Their perspectives and opinions rushed upon us and enveloped us.  As they related to us, they created a picture of ourselves in our hearts.  This picture can be a positive legacy or, sadly, a curse. </span></p>
<p><span style="color: #008000; font-size: small;"><strong>S</strong></span><span style="font-size: x-small;">everal years ago I was meeting with a group of women, and they described a woman who was not present.  One of the women in the group related how she and the absent woman would go to single bars or to a party together.  The woman who was speaking was quite attractive and had done some modeling.  Inevitably, she said, the other woman, who was short and a little plump, would end up receiving all the attention from the men.  The men would ignore her more attractive friends and focus on her.  The pretty woman &#8212; who was telling the story &#8212; volunteered that this less attractive woman was a delight and very &#8216;other&#8217; centered. </span></p>
<p><span style="color: #008000; font-size: small;"><strong>I</strong></span><span style="font-size: x-small;"> heard so much about this person that I looked forward to meeting her.  Finally, I did, and she met my expectations.  It was easy to see why so many men found her attractive.  She was comfortable with herself and cheerful, but she was also very interested in the people about her.  I asked her why she was so comfortable with herself.  She said that in the family she grew up in she had a deep sense of being loved and liked.</span></p>
<p><span style="color: #008000; font-size: small;"><strong>S</strong></span><span style="font-size: x-small;">he received a great gift from her parents – a positive picture of herself.  Many parents give to their children the great gift of a positive and honest picture of who they are.  Such a picture also goes beyond the person herself or himself to a picture of the acceptability of one’s gender.  Some mothers, for example, who despise themselves sometimes pass on to their daughters a hopelessly flawed picture of femininity.  One of the realities that one runs into again and again in counseling is either indifference or animosity towards one’s own gender.  A positive or negative reaction to one’s gender comes out of the family context.</span></p>
<p><span style="color: #008000; font-size: small;"><strong>I</strong></span><span style="font-size: x-small;"> have worked in many churches of varying ethnic diversity.  As I did so, I could not help but notice, and was also frequently told, that in the traditional Chinese homes, boys were much preferred over girls.  What seems to be a common tragedy is that within those homes, it is the mother who is the fiercest supporter of the traditional system.  I have had Chinese women, in tears and anger, tell me how they felt deeply betrayed by their own mothers.  They taught these daughters by word and example to view themselves as inferior to their brothers.  Further, the parents made decisions that always favored the boys.  <strong>In the healthy home a positive but equal affection is extended towards the two genders</strong>.</span></p>
<p><span style="color: #008000; font-size: small;"><strong>A</strong></span><span style="font-size: x-small;">nother instinctive pattern is introduced in the home, and that is the regard shown between the family members.  Not only does a child learn about himself or herself, the child also learns instinctively what the relationship between the genders is, what the relationship between the parents is, and what the relationship  between the parents and the children is.  For example, <strong>the greatest gift a father can give to his children is to love their mother and show that love in affectionate ways</strong>.</span></p>
<p><span style="color: #008000; font-size: small;"><strong>S</strong></span><span style="font-size: x-small;">o we see that the self-portrait is painted in a thousand different ways.  When it is painted right, the children have an affectionate and honest picture of themselves imprinted across their hearts.  Also, by the example of the relationship between the parents, the children learn an instinctive respect for the opposite gender.  A foundation is placed for the other two elements of a healthy family: deep affection and the use of happiness skills.</span></p>
<p><span style="color: #008000; font-size: small;"><strong>W</strong></span><span style="font-size: x-small;">hen positive identities are present, then, the husband feels good about being male, he has an idea of what that is, and he enjoys the role of a husband.  The same is true of the wife.  She knows what it means to be feminine and positively regards her gender and her role.</span></p>
<p><strong><span style="color: #008000;">Deep Affection </span></strong></p>
<p><span style="color: #008000; font-size: small;"><strong>C</strong></span><span style="font-size: x-small;">hildren are interesting to watch.  When an adult turns to them in attentive affection, one can almost see the child shiver in instinctive delight.  <strong>Affection creates a powerful and positive current within family life</strong>.  A good home is a pleasurable place.</span></p>
<p><span style="color: #008000; font-size: small;"><strong>I</strong></span><span style="font-size: x-small;">f strong bonds of affection exist, the process of confronting and disciplining teenagers is much easier.  When a child feels nurtured, standards are more easily enforced.  For example, Paul the Apostle, a teacher in the church of the first century A.D., told fathers particularly to invest their own hearts in their children and not to continually make them angry:</span></p>
<p><em><span style="font-size: x-small;">Fathers, stop making your children angry, but nurture them out of your own hearts in a process of child training and confrontation in harmony with the Lord.  <span style="color: #000080;"><strong>Ephesians 6:4</strong></span></span></em></p>
<p><span style="color: #008000; font-size: small;"><strong>A</strong></span><span style="font-size: x-small;">ffection turns a house into a home; it is the glue holding a family together.  Researchers tell us that 80% of communication is non-verbal; the glance of the eyes and the bend of the body and the smile on the face say things that words cannot.  Non-verbal communication is created by the affection between people.  If positive identities exist and deep affection abides, the final bonds holding the family together are happiness skills.</span></p>
<p><strong><span style="color: #008000;">Happiness Skills</span></strong></p>
<p><span style="color: #008000; font-size: small;"><strong>H</strong></span><span style="font-size: x-small;">appiness skills are those abilities healthy and happy people use to sustain relationships.  Examples of such skills are manifold.  <strong>Trusting</strong> is a skill.  Created in a loyal, affectionate environment, trust creates friendships and sustains love.  Due to the rising tide of divorce and desertions by husbands and fathers, many individuals have lost that ability. </span></p>
<p><span style="color: #008000; font-size: small;"><strong>E</strong></span><span style="font-size: x-small;">vidence for this exists all around us.  We have the highest percentage of single adults in our nation’s history.  The second highest was right after the Civil War when due to the War many marriages were postponed.  In parts of Northern California, where I live, certain counties have more single adults than married individuals.  Many believe this is due to the inability of single people to entrust themselves to others.  Due to that inability, many will never marry.</span></p>
<p><span style="color: #008000; font-size: small;"><strong>O</strong></span><span style="font-size: x-small;">ther happiness skills are <strong>conflict resolution</strong> skills. If a couple cannot work through differences, they will separate emotionally or even physically.  That is one of the fundamental skills of marriage, along with the capacity to spend time together and to hold a conversation.  <strong>Holding a conversation</strong> might seem like a simple skill, but couple after couple confuse that with problem solving.  Conversation takes place when two people share their days.  It is similar to a weather report; they describe the atmosphere within.  In their conversation, they should share the happiest moments in their day, the saddest moment in their day, a hurt they suffered throughout the day, and something they would like without demanding it.  As they do this day after day, such conversation will become the delight of their lives together.</span></p>
<p><span style="color: #008000; font-size: small;"><strong>T</strong></span><span style="font-size: x-small;">hese basic skills are the glue of relationships.  Affection and romance bring couples together, but it is a healthy identity that will serve as foundation for their life.  Their happiness skills will develop their love, and ease them through personal problems.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-size: x-small;">Here are a few articles I thought you&#8217;d like on <a href="http://www.luvcube.com/live-love/happy-relationships-ingredients.htm">Happy Relationships</a></span></p>
<p><span style="font-size: x-small;"><a href="http://www.buzzle.com/editorials/8-30-2005-75784.asp" target="_blank"><strong>7 Unfailing Laws of Happy Relationships</strong></a></span></p>
<p><span style="font-size: x-small;"><a href="http://allwomenstalk.com/secret-rules-for-happy-relationship/" target="_blank"><strong>5 Secret Rules for a Happy Relationship. Shhh!</strong></a></span></p>
<p><span style="font-size: x-small;"><a href="http://happymarriages.com/" target="_blank"><strong>Happy Relationships Blog</strong></a></span></p>
<p><span style="font-size: x-small;"><a href="http://www.girl.com.au/happyrelationships.htm" target="_blank"><strong>Maintaining a Happy Relationship</strong></a></span></td>
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		<title>Life Solutions Theme: Relationships</title>
		<link>http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/life-solutions-theme-relationships/</link>
		<comments>http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/life-solutions-theme-relationships/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 03 Jun 2010 08:00:21 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Christianity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Relationships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self Care]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[christian values]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[God]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[relationship with God]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[spirituality]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.iamlovable.com/?p=638</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The quality of our relationships are completely dependent upon our willingness to enter into a friendship with God.  Scripture teaches us that we can love when we accept the love that God has for us.  We love because He first loved us.  We did not initiate any relationship with God.  He did that for us.  We are merely responders.  Our great responsibility is to explore the depth of love that God has given through His Son Jesus Christ.
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><span style="font-size: x-small;"><strong><img src="http://www.whatgodintended.com/content/images/r.gif" border="0" alt="Christian Relationship" width="41" height="48" align="left" />elationships</strong> exist because God the Trinity exists!  Christianity is different from Judaism, Hinduism, and Islam because of the Trinity.  Judaism and Islam are absolutely monotheistic; there is no personal differentiation in the Godhead.  In those two religions god is lonely.  He only has himself to relate to.  Christianity says that God relates within Himself as three persons who are in an everlasting, eternal “dance” of joy.  Hinduism says in one of its forms that all is god.  Reality is all one, which is pantheism, or as <strong>Francis Schaeffer</strong> would say, <em>paneverythingism</em>.   Ultimately, in Hinduism, personality and relationship is an illusion that will disappear.</p>
<p></span><strong><span style="color: #008000; font-size: small;"><img src="http://www.whatgodintended.com/content/images/relating.jpg" border="0" alt="Healthy Family Relationship" hspace="5" vspace="5" width="150" height="102" align="left" />C</span></strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">hristianity teaches instead that relationship has preceded everything.  God is One in three persons, therefore, God <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><strong>is</strong></span> relationship.  In the first chapter of the Bible we have the Spirit of God hovering over the earth, and we have two members of the Trinity communicating over the creation of the “relaters,” Adam and Eve.  We can relate because we are made in the image and likeness of God.  Relationships, however, are at their greatest health when they are infused with the character of God.</p>
<p></span><strong><span style="color: #008000; font-size: small;">T</span></strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">he quality of our relationships are completely dependent upon our willingness to enter into a friendship with God.  Scripture teaches us that we can love when we accept the love that God has for us.  <em>We love because He first loved us</em>.  We did not initiate any relationship with God.  He did that for us.  We are merely responders.  Our great responsibility is to explore the depth of love that God has given through His Son Jesus Christ.</p>
<p></span><strong><span style="color: #008000; font-size: small;">W</span></strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">e are also called to relationships with others.  It is having God’s kind of love in our lives, &#8220;agape love&#8221; the Bible calls it, for others.  This love is emotional and profoundly sympathetic.</p>
<p></span><strong><span style="color: #008000; font-size: small;">P</span></strong><span style="font-size: x-small;">robably the best way to describe the use of the Bible is that it is the <strong>Book of Relationships</strong>.  The Bible is not an end in itself, but it is a tool to create healthy relationships with God and others.  Evil attitudes and acts and ineffective communication is dealt with in the Bible because it is telling us what love is not.  We are not left in the dark as to what God considers normal and healthy, nor is there little doubt within the pages of the Bible as to what is unhealthy.  We have principles and models, with the greatest model being the Trinity, the <strong>eternal romance</strong>.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-size: x-small;">Reference: <a href="http://www.whatgodintended.com/content/theme-relationships.asp">http://www.whatgodintended.com/content/theme-relationships.asp</a></span></p>
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		<title>Side Swiped</title>
		<link>http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/side-swiped/</link>
		<comments>http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/side-swiped/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 09 Mar 2010 13:45:50 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Relationships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self Care]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[christian values]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.iamlovable.com/?p=627</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[There are going to be experiences in your life that will leave you feeling like you got sideswiped in the middle of an intersection.  I personally experienced this physically &#8211; a person ran a red light and hit the drivers side of my car.  This was of course, many years ago.  I was at an [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>There are going to be experiences in your life that will leave you feeling like you got sideswiped in the middle of an intersection.  I personally experienced this physically &#8211; a person ran a red light and hit the drivers side of my car.  This was of course, many years ago.  I was at an intersection, and my light turned green.  I had a very strong feeling not to cross over the intersection, but I looked both ways and didn&#8217;t see a car coming, besides, the light was green so it was my turn to go.</p>
<p>As I was about to shift into 2nd gear, I saw a bright light and heard an explosion, not realizing what had happened, all I thought was how I knew not to cross over the intersection even though the light was green and I didn&#8217;t see a car coming. It wasn&#8217;t until after my car stopped spinning that I realized how accurate my intuition/premonition was, and I had gone against myself.</p>
<p>The lesson is, if we get a gut feeling about someone, a job, or about a business deal, no matter how good it appears on paper or in person, if you have a bad gut feeling, you need to trust it and use it to make wise decisions in your life.</p>
<p>I was side-swiped by a person who I thought was my friend. There were subtle signs. The first one is the invisible arm that goes up when ever I was around her.  In the past when ever I listened to this signal, I was spared alot of pain.  In this particular case, I was looking at her words and actions and went with that, vs. the danger signals I was receiving in my body.</p>
<p>As my intuition would have it, it was a matter of time when I started receiving vicious emails with false accusations and critical judgmental comments made at me and my person.  It made no sense to me, because I had spent alot of time helping her, networking her and her Meetup group and sending prospects her way.  I didn&#8217;t dignify her emails with a response or explanation. They were just outright far from reality and downright rude and disrespectful.  She educated me on what she thought of me, and I was grateful to verify that she is someone I certainly wouldn&#8217;t want to have a joint partnership with and to call a friend.</p>
<p>So if you have someone who is hovering around you, labeling you, criticizing or belittling you, just know it&#8217;s not you, it&#8217;s the other person.  You stay focused on your dream and vision. See it as a distraction &#8211; most importantly, forgive that person and see it as an opportunity to move in the right direction.  You don&#8217;t need to prove your innocence (there isn&#8217;t anything to explain or apologize for, right?) just see it as God&#8217;s way of growing you up and becoming a leader,harnessing your character and integrity for success!</p>
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		<title>2010 Personal Changes-Resolution #1</title>
		<link>http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/2010-personal-changes-resolution-numbro-uno/</link>
		<comments>http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/2010-personal-changes-resolution-numbro-uno/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 18 Feb 2010 15:03:50 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Relationships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Self Care]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[single women]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[women]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[healthy boundaries]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.iamlovable.com/?p=621</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Yesterday I said I wasn&#8217;t really into resolutions, but in a round about way, I do actually form a few resolutions, but they are held loosely because I know from experience how often those resolutions change form and direction. I had a lot of issues with internal boundaries last year, in fact, I think it [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div id="attachment_38" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 138px"><a href="http://www.iamlovable.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/Ana-Lucia-Novak.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-38" title="Ana Lucia Novak" src="http://www.iamlovable.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/Ana-Lucia-Novak.jpg" alt="" width="128" height="128" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">Headshot in SF</p></div>
<p>Yesterday I said I wasn&#8217;t really into resolutions, but in a round about way, I do actually form a few resolutions, but they are held loosely because I know from experience how often those resolutions change form and direction.</p>
<p>I had a lot of issues with internal boundaries last year, in fact, I think it goes farther back.  As an online business owner, it&#8217;s easy to lose track of time, forget to eat and exercise.  Yes! I do forget to eat! I&#8217;m passionate about social media and I love to read, I actually lose my appetite!</p>
<p>But as I am heading to age 47 &#8211; well, I&#8217;m having a hard time saying I&#8217;m going to be 47, because it feels so foreign.  I feel like I&#8217;m in my 30&#8242;s until I look into the mirror (after taking a shower) and it&#8217;s a whole nother story! Hence, time to act upon &#8220;those resolutions&#8221;</p>
<p>What motivates me this time is that I can visualize the benefits of working towards resolutions &#8211; because what I&#8217;m really doing here is learning a new way of living and creating better habits that will affect my husband, family, neighbors and friends.</p>
<p>Here&#8217;s Resolution #1</p>
<p>- Form healthy boundaries within myself :</p>
<p>a light bulb went off last summer. I overspent on money and over gave of my time, resources, and energy, then I would end up feeling depleted, unappreciated and discouraged.  Don&#8217;t get me wrong, I do not expect to get extra stars for being generous.  I am referring to my nature of being a giver, nurturer, helper.  When I meet people socially and they begin to talk to me about their lives, work, and issues, my mind and heart begin to spin into &#8220;help&#8221; mode.  I haven&#8217;t received any complaints about this trait, except my own inner voice that says I need to balance that part of me better, that I don&#8217;t need to foot the bill all the time nor do I need to put myself in situations to foot the bill (mentally, financially, physically).  As far as feeling depleted/unappreciated and discouraged &#8211; well, some people are takers without a thought of the energy behind my giving.  They  have  a stingy spirit, or a scarcity mentality. If they&#8217;re not sizing me up physically, they are doing it in other ways, my giving isn&#8217;t really ever enough, almost like to them I just &#8220;didn&#8217;t give enough&#8221;.   I realize that my boundaries will be respected when I start to respect and honor MY OWN boundaries within.  I also know that if someone has unrealistic expectations of me, I don&#8217;t need to agree to it, and saying No actually gives me the confidence in honoring myself, and reinforces those boundaries.</p>
<p>Lesson: There is a time to give, a time to pitch in, a time to do nothing, my value and worth is the same regardless of how much I give.</p>
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		<title>Certainty</title>
		<link>http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/certainty/</link>
		<comments>http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/certainty/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 22 Jan 2010 22:47:52 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Relationships]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/certainty/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Certainty It was a Sunday morning as I approached the altar at Dance Spirit to use the tarot deck. In my mind was a question about outcomes. As I sat at the altar, question in mind, I pulled a tarot card and got an “answer” that seemed totally irrelevant to my question. Of course that [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Certainty</p>
<p>It was a Sunday morning as I approached the altar at Dance Spirit to use the tarot deck. In my mind was a question about outcomes. As I sat at the altar, question in mind, I pulled a tarot card and got an “answer” that seemed totally irrelevant to my question. Of course that did not stop me from pulling several other cards, which also did not seem relevant. Frustrated with non-answers I gave up.</p>
<p>The following week and for several weeks afterward, my questions were usually met with either more irrelevant answers, or answers I did not want to hear. A few times the cards gave me responses I desired but I realized I did not believe the good things the cards seemed to indicate would happen if I remained on my current path. Still each week I approached the altar, unaware how wonderful a mirror of my own inner process this experience was providing.</p>
<p>Finally one week as I was about to pick a tarot card, I heard my inner wisdom ask “What outcome do you want?” I realized that the tarot cards did not tell me what was going to happen because I create my own reality. The information from the cards did not matter. I have known for many years that predictive tools only show you the most likely outcome given your current path, and that they mostly show you your own inner process, but still that did not stop me from wanting to know the most likely outcome and from understanding my own thinking. The message “What outcome do you want?” changed all that. I don’t need to understand my own thinking. All I need to do is choose what I want.</p>
<p>If you have read books such as “The Secret,” and even if you haven’t, you have probably heard the idea that you create your reality via your thinking and beliefs. You probably also know how difficult it is to avoid falling back into limiting beliefs and thinking. No sooner do create an intention than the limiting thinking and beliefs show up, telling you what you want is not possible, etc. Or perhaps, like me, you seek confirmation that what you are doing is working. Constantly wondering, worrying, and checking will sabotage your heart felt intentions. Tarot cards were a way I checked in to see how my inner work and intentions was progressing. However, since my checking was coming from fear that my manifesting was not working, it was coming from limitation.</p>
<p>So what to do? How can you tell if your manifesting is working, especially when addressing areas of your life where results can take a while to show up? How can you do this in a way that supports your manifesting? This is the role of certainty. Since you create your reality, instead of checking to see how it is working, worrying that it is not, or feeling frustrated at what seems like lack of results, use the power of certainty. Each time you seek confirmation, or feel frustrated, choose to feel certainty.</p>
<p>What does it feel like to be certain? Begin with something you feel certain about, such as your eye or skin color. It is important to choose something you are so certain about that if someone told you otherwise, you would doubt their sanity. Feel what it feels like to be certain. Once you can do this, feel the thing you wish to manifest and transfer the feeling of certainty onto your manifestation. Then whenever you seek confirmation it is working, or when you feel doubt or fear, feel again the certainty. If you lose touch with what it feels like to be certain, go back to the original thing that you are certain about beyond any doubt and again transfer it to that which you are manifesting. Feel the calm knowing, the strength, of certainty. Allow certainty to work for you and whatever happens in your life, know for certain that all is well. </p>
<p>Linda White Dove</p>
<p>Copyright 2009 Linda White Dove</p>
<p>Permission is granted to share this article with others, provided you include my name as author, along with my website.</p>
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<p>      <span style="font-size:90%;font-style:italic">
<p>Linda White Dove, M. Ed. is an awakening facilitator working with people from around the world via the Life Mastery Attunement and Sexual Empowerment Attunement. She has also written a book and is in the process of finding an agent. To read more of Linda&#8217;s writing, learn more about the attunements and/or sign up for her e mail list: <a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.lindawhitedove.com">http://www.lindawhitedove.com</a> </p>
<p>Article Source:<a target="_blank" href="http://www.articlesbase.com/law-of-attraction-articles/certainty-1767433.html" title="Certainty">http://www.articlesbase.com/law-of-attraction-articles/certainty-1767433.html</a></p>
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		<title>How to Use &#8220;Belief&#8221; for Success: Part 1</title>
		<link>http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/how-to-use-belief-for-success-part-1/</link>
		<comments>http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/how-to-use-belief-for-success-part-1/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 22 Jan 2010 19:50:36 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Relationships]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/how-to-use-belief-for-success-part-1/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Many of us have read endless books on attracting success and prosperity, books that promise you that all of your dreams will come true. You will attract more wealth, get the promotion, be in perfect health, or get the loving relationship that you always wanted. Many different tips and techniques are offered forth in these [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Many of us have read endless books on attracting success and prosperity, books that promise you that all of your dreams will come true. You will attract more wealth, get the promotion, be in perfect health, or get the loving relationship that you always wanted. Many different tips and techniques are offered forth in these books from the very simplistic to the very complex and time consuming. However, there is one point that almost all of the books agree on. You have to believe it if you want to achieve it. No doubt scores of people have devoured every one of these books and came out no better off than they started. Why?</p>
<p>A major cause of the failures of these systems is that even though they tell you to “believe”, none of them tell you how you can teach yourself to believe. Maybe you just think you believe but deep down inside you really don’t. Maybe you’ve been in negative circumstances for so long that you can’t even begin to conceive of them changing for the better. If you can’t teach yourself to truly believe then your circumstances really won’t ever change for the better no matter how many success books you read.</p>
<p>If you are a frequent reader of such book you have no doubt been advised time and again to “think positive” and to “guard against negative thoughts”. They tell you if a negative thought comes into your mind to immediately banish it and replace it with a positive thought. Simple, right? Not really. What they don’t take into account is that if you are reading such books you probably have had little if any success in your life or you wouldn’t be reading them in the first place. </p>
<p>Perhaps a river of negative thoughts has flowed through your mind for so long that it has created a “Grand Canyon” of negativity in your mind. In situations like this an occasional, weak, positive thought is not enough to overcome failure and replace it with victory. You have to learn to fill in that “Grand Canyon” with the soil of positive thoughts. BUT, unfortunately these books rarely if ever say exactly “how” to do it.</p>
<p>PLEASE READ: How to use &#8220;Belief&#8221; for Success&#8221; Part 2</p>
<p>      <!--INFOLINKS_OFF--></p>
<p>      <span style="font-size:90%;font-style:italic">
<p>For more information on Success Tips,Overcoming Failure, Positive Thinking, and receive a FREE &#8220;Science of Getting Rich&#8221; E-Book<br />
<a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.squidoo.com/using_mental_power_to_atrract_money">CLICK HERE</a> </p>
<p>For a FREE 5-Part E-Course on developing your mind and brain power using Quantum Mind Power principles<br />
<a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.squidoo.com/increaseyourmentalpower">CLICK HERE</a> </p>
<p>Article Source:<a target="_blank" href="http://www.articlesbase.com/law-of-attraction-articles/how-to-use-belief-for-success-part-1-1763274.html">http://www.articlesbase.com/law-of-attraction-articles/how-to-use-belief-for-success-part-1-1763274.html</a></p>
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		<title>How to Use &#8220;Belief&#8221; for Success: Part 2</title>
		<link>http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/how-to-use-belief-for-success-part-2/</link>
		<comments>http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/how-to-use-belief-for-success-part-2/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 22 Jan 2010 19:50:31 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Relationships]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/how-to-use-belief-for-success-part-2/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Having belief is important for your success in life. In fact it is crucial to your happiness and success in every area of your life –not just material and financial. And, yes, you do need to think positive thoughts and believe you can achieve what you desire. Your thoughts determine your emotions-good or bad. Your [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Having belief is important for your success in life. In fact it is crucial to your happiness and success in every area of your life –not just material and financial. And, yes, you do need to think positive thoughts and believe you can achieve what you desire. </p>
<p>Your thoughts determine your emotions-good or bad. Your emotions determine your belief or disbelief. Your belief or disbelief determines your faith. Your faith determines your persistence. And ALL of these things determine your eventual success-or failure.</p>
<p>So, HOW do you learn to believe and change your negative, failure, mindset into a positive, powerful and successful one? You have to do it ONE thought at a time. And you have to keep doing it all day long, every day.</p>
<p>Start out with positive affirmations. Write down what you want and read it aloud as many times daily as possible. When you are reading try to strongly visualize what you want. Think how happy you will feel when that desire becomes a reality for you. Really immerse yourself in that happiness and enthusiasm. Train your mind to associate those emotions with your goal. Do this until your subconscious accepts this as reality. Then you can’t help but to believe!</p>
<p>But don’t stop there. Positive affirmations may not be enough to induce you to believe. Another great way to develop the power to believe is to read inspirational books. They can be about success, love, religion, hopes, dreams…it really doesn’t matter. What DOES matter is that you choose a book that is really positive-a book that really gets you fired up. A book that says over and over, “you can do it!”, you can win!”, “don’t give up, you’re so close!”. A book that just showers you in positive thoughts of support and success. </p>
<p>Read these books over and over for best results and when you feel that happiness, enthusiasm and excitement about your goals and desires…THEN is the perfect time to say your affirmations. When you do this, I think you will find that gradually you WILL believe and your mind will be changed from completely negative to completely positive. And …when you really, truly believe then you really CAN accomplish anything you desire.</p>
<p>      <!--INFOLINKS_OFF--></p>
<p>      <span style="font-size:90%;font-style:italic">
<p>For a FREE &#8220;Science of Getting Rich&#8221; E-Book and more info on Success Tips and Positive Thinking<br />
<a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.squidoo.com/using_mental_power_to_atrract_money">CLICK HERE</a></p>
<p>For a FREE 5-Part E-Course on developing your mind and brain power by using Quantum Mind Power principles<br />
<a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.squidoo.com/increaseyourmentalpower">CLICK HERE</a> </p>
<p>Article Source:<a target="_blank" href="http://www.articlesbase.com/law-of-attraction-articles/how-to-use-belief-for-success-part-2-1763302.html">http://www.articlesbase.com/law-of-attraction-articles/how-to-use-belief-for-success-part-2-1763302.html</a></p>
<p>     </span></p>
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		<title>Who Needs More Money? Can You Earn More Money? Need Ideas To Make Money?</title>
		<link>http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/who-needs-more-money-can-you-earn-more-money-need-ideas-to-make-money/</link>
		<comments>http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/who-needs-more-money-can-you-earn-more-money-need-ideas-to-make-money/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 22 Jan 2010 13:15:05 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Relationships]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Hello Americans, Are You Searching For A Way To Make Money? YOU have to take the proverbial &#8220;bull by the horns&#8221; and really do something about it! You CAN do it if you really want to!   Here are four important facts you may not be aware of: Almost everybody you know, loves to buy things for [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<h3>Hello Americans, Are You Searching For A Way To Make Money?</h3>
<h3>YOU have to take the proverbial &#8220;bull by the horns&#8221; and really do something about it! You CAN do it if you really want to!</h3>
<p> </p>
<p>Here are four important facts you may not be aware of:</p>
<p><strong>Almost everybody you know, loves to buy things for themselves and sometimes for people they care about!</strong></p>
<p><strong>Almost everybody you know, loves to get a Great Deal when they are buying something!</strong></p>
<p><strong>Almost everybody you know, has at least a little bit of cash to spend, even in this bad economy!</strong></p>
<p><strong>Almost everybody YOU know, will buy something from you &#8220;on impulse&#8221; if they are given the chance!</strong></p>
<p>Let me ask you? Do you have at least <em>some ability</em> to communicate, some gumption, and perhaps a bit of sales ability!? Can you bring yourself to work at selling some cool merchandise? <strong>(NOT MLM and NO recruiting people!)</strong> If you do have some salesmanship, then you can actually buy a small quantity of wholesale merchandise, and then turn around and sell it to people in your area for a cash profit! Whether these people are your friends, co-workers, family members, neighbors, or people you bump into at the bank, grocery store or post office, you can sell various things to people, and they will buy things from you &#8220;on impulse&#8221; and they will <strong>pay you in cash!</strong> (<em>Wink! wink!</em>)</p>
<p>I am actually a self-help writer and speaker, and I know that this is a fact because I have been selling merchandise to people in my town since my childhood! I always get a thrill from selling quality merchandise to other people at a discounted price, and it is nice to have some daily cash income always coming in! <strong>Cash!</strong></p>
<p><strong>***Please Note: Good Karma!***</strong> Please share this information with any loved ones or friends who might benefit from this article from <strong>ArticlesBase.com</strong> by sending them the link or forwarding the piece to them! <strong>Thanks!</strong></p>
<p>I have also been a published writer (<em>usually as a ghost writer</em>) for the past 32 years, but I also enjoy buying and selling, and I have this awesome website where we sell things <strong>retail and wholesale!</strong> If you see something that you would like to buy, but in small quantities, and at wholesale prices, then you are invited to please send an e-mail and inquire about the items you want and in what quantities! In the meantime, and to make life easier, we have a bunch of <strong><a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.fathertimepublishing.com/default.php?cPath=2358876&amp;s=8c5300ec4c5fc49349412010bf687b50">Wholesale Deals Available To Ordinary People, Seen By Clicking Here!</a></strong></p>
<p>There are well over 50 awesome Wholesale Deals available at the moment, and when I say &#8220;ordinary people&#8221; what I mean is that you don&#8217;t have to have a business license, a special bank account, a tax ID number, or anything complicated! We are willing to sell <em>five of these</em> or <em>ten of those</em> or a <em>dozen of something</em> at wholesale prices to people who will turn around and sell them for a cash profit! Or maybe you want to use them as gifts!</p>
<p>Listen to this&#8230;We actually have several customers who are <strong>college girls</strong> and they buy a batch of 25 or 50 self-defense pepper sprays, then they turn around and sell them to other students on their campus, and other people around the town! They are making cash income daily, and you can too, if you want to do it!</p>
<p>We are aware that there are those who don&#8217;t want to lay out a hundred bucks for some merchandise, either because they are afraid they may not be able to sell the items, or because they don&#8217;t have the cash to get started, and we offer the opportunity for someone to order a few <strong><a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.fathertimepublishing.com/default.php?cPath=2840939&amp;s=8c5300ec4c5fc49349412010bf687b50">Awesome Catalogs Seen By Clicking Here</a></strong> and then they can use these catalogs to sell from! Take orders from people, collect the payments in advance, then keep a 25% commission, and use the balance to pay for the merchandise which gets sent by UPS to your door. Then deliver it to your customers, and maybe even get another order at that time! People love shopping from catalogs! <em>Ever see someone go nuts over an Avon catalog?</em></p>
<p><strong>YOU can definitely earn cash starting in a few days</strong> without having to get into any kind of <em>Ponzi Scheme</em>, recruit people, buy eight thousand bottles of vitamins, or mortgage the house, as long as you are willing to sell, and are not afraid! You will only have to count on yourself to sell 50 Key Chain Pepper Sprays for a cash profit, or take some orders from catalogs that you show around your neighborhood, campus, or community!</p>
<p><strong>Remember: &#8220;The person who says it cannot be done, should not interrupt the person who is doing it!&#8221;</strong></p>
<p><strong>Note:</strong> If you already have a great way to make money but just need some motivation, then I also write an awesome <a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.fathertimepublishing.com/product_info.php?cPath=2900129&amp;products_id=42486784&amp;s=8c5300ec4c5fc49349412010bf687b50"><strong>Daily Dose of Motivation via e-mail Seen By Clicking Here!</strong></a><strong> </strong>There is a special on at the moment, regarding subscriptions to this awesome service!</p>
<p><strong>Good Luck and Many Blessings!</strong></p>
<p>      <!--INFOLINKS_OFF--></p>
<p>      <span style="font-size:90%;font-style:italic">
<p>Father Time has been a published writer for over thirty two years and particularly focuses on motivational and self-help writing and speaking! He also has many years of sales experience and writes sales &amp; marketing training and materials. He has a fabulous eBook featuring over 111 Ideas How Practically Anyone Can Make Money From Home With Their Very Own Home Based Business! You don&#8217;t have to live in the USA for this eBook to help you!</p>
<p>Father Time currently does a lot of writing for hire, especially article marketing pieces for folks who have their own websites to promote. IF you have a website, you should contact him for some good writing to promote your site; right away! You will be glad that you did! Details are found on his website!</p>
<p>Father Time also deals in wholesale merchandise, and is willing to help ordinary people who need to earn cash, by selling small quantities of wholesale items that people can re-sell for a cash profit. This is an easy way to earn an immediate cash income, it&#8217;s just like selling Avon, for example! There are great catalogs available as well!</p>
<p>Father&#8217;s website: <a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.FatherTimePublishing.com">www.FatherTimePublishing.com</a> and if YOU are simply purchasing at retail, you save an extra 15% off. (Sorry, discount doesn&#8217;t apply to writing, readings, eBooks, sales items, or wholesale packages) The coupon code is: SaveNow</p>
<p>Article Source:<a target="_blank" href="http://www.articlesbase.com/law-of-attraction-articles/who-needs-more-money-can-you-earn-more-money-need-ideas-to-make-money-1766421.html" title="Who Needs More Money? Can You Earn More Money? Need Ideas To Make Money?">http://www.articlesbase.com/law-of-attraction-articles/who-needs-more-money-can-you-earn-more-money-need-ideas-to-make-money-1766421.html</a></p>
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		<title>A Simple, Yet Powerful Little Truth About You and the Universe</title>
		<link>http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/a-simple-yet-powerful-little-truth-about-you-and-the-universe/</link>
		<comments>http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/a-simple-yet-powerful-little-truth-about-you-and-the-universe/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 21 Jan 2010 21:53:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[Your emotions are your guidance system. Whatever you are feeling is a direct indication of whether or not you are in alignment with who you really are.  What do I mean by that?  I mean your Soul Work.  What are you here for?  What goals to you want to accomplish in this life.  How do [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Your emotions are your guidance system. Whatever you are feeling is a direct indication of whether or not you are in alignment with who you really are.  What do I mean by that?  I mean your Soul Work.  What are you here for?  What goals to you want to accomplish in this life.  How do you want to go about it?  Listen to that little inner voice that says YES! whenever something excites you.  Follow that feeling. When you are feeling Happy, Joyful, Loving, Grateful, or any other positive emotion, you are leaning towards <em>who you really are</em>. Those good feelings are the Universe&#8217;s way of saying &#8220;Yes! You&#8217;re on the right track.  This is <em>who you are</em>!&#8221;</p>
<p> Conversely when you&#8217;re feeling negative emotions like hate, anger, jealousy, sadness, depression, the Universe is still trying to give you a message.  That message is &#8220;This is not who you are.  This is uncomfortable.  This doesn&#8217;t fit.&#8221; When you think about it, isn&#8217;t that a great system?  Doesn&#8217;t that give you the utmost hope? So, if you are feeling upset over your financial circumstances, do you know what that really means?  It means the Universe is saying &#8221; but you&#8217;re Rich! Why are you feeling poor? Get out of this space immediately!&#8221;  Isn&#8217;t it comforting to know that your negative emotions are the Universe&#8217;s way of saying that, in fact, you are the opposite of what you are feeling? That must mean the Universe knows you are:</p>
<p> Rich<br /> Successful<br /> Healthy<br /> Happy<br /> Joyful<br /> Giving<br /> Abundant in every good way<br /> And a million other wonderful things&#8230;. </p>
<p> To me, that&#8217;s a very comforting thought.  I recommend you remember that the next time you are feeling down.  It&#8217;s the Universe&#8217;s way of saying &#8220;Chin up! You are better than this!&#8221;  So, why not listen? You well automatically feel better when you realize this simple, yet powerful little truth.  You are SPLENDID!!! And The Universe knows it.</p>
<p>      <!--INFOLINKS_OFF--></p>
<p>      <span style="font-size:90%;font-style:italic">
<p>Writer of Soul Steering: Learning to Use The Law of Attraction Consciously.</p>
<p><a rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="http://soulsteering.blogspot.com/">http://soulsteering.blogspot.com/</a></p>
<p>Article Source:<a target="_blank" href="http://www.articlesbase.com/law-of-attraction-articles/a-simple-yet-powerful-little-truth-about-you-and-the-universe-1761669.html" title="A Simple, Yet Powerful Little Truth About You and the Universe">http://www.articlesbase.com/law-of-attraction-articles/a-simple-yet-powerful-little-truth-about-you-and-the-universe-1761669.html</a></p>
<p>     </span></p>
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		<title>Overcome Adversity, Gain Strength, and Win!</title>
		<link>http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/overcome-adversity-gain-strength-and-win/</link>
		<comments>http://www.iamlovable.com/relationships/overcome-adversity-gain-strength-and-win/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 21 Jan 2010 11:22:28 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Relationships]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[By Erin Emmons Everyone has gone through difficult times that are hard to bear. You may have lost your job, your money, your credit, be deeply in debt and have a strained relationship with your significant other. It is easy to think that you are the only one that experiences hard times and other people [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>By Erin Emmons</p>
<p>Everyone has gone through difficult times that are hard to bear. You may have lost your job, your money, your credit, be deeply in debt and have a strained relationship with your significant other. It is easy to think that you are the only one that experiences hard times and other people get all the “breaks” in life. </p>
<p>You may not have deserved your misfortune but it depends on how you react to these situations that determines the eventual outcome. You can decide to give up and die or you can decide to fight. You’re already in a fight; you might as well fight back.</p>
<p>Is it possible to gain strength through adversity? It is if you closely analyze the situation that you face. The great success philosophy writer, Napoleon Hill, said, “Every defeat carries within it the seed of an equivalent advantage”. This means that no matter how bad the situation is if you keep on in persistence and belief you can turn that bad deal into something that is just as good (or even better)as the bad thing was bad.</p>
<p>If we think about it honestly then it is easy to see that adversity really does strengthen us and doesn’t come to destroy us but to bring us new opportunities, i.e. to promote us. </p>
<p>I think back to some of my favorite movies and I see this truth played out again and again. In “The Karate Kid” would Daniel Laruso ever have become the All-Valley Karate Champion if the Kobra Kais hadn’t of beaten him up a few times? Definitely not! He would have gone through his life being completely ordinary and Mr. Miyagi and he would not have developed such a strong friendship. The beatings weren’t good for sure but that’s why Daniel became the Karate Champion. He wanted to stand on his own…and stop being a punching bag.</p>
<p>In “Back to the Future”, Marty McFly’s father would have never changed and become successful if Marty hadn’t accidentally gone back in time and endangered his own existence. That strong adversity of losing his very life gave Marty the very strong impetus to make things right again with the space-time continuum. In the end, Marty gets his parents to fall in love, saves his existence, and his father becomes a famous science fiction writer in the bargain. If none of that ever happened, George McFly would still be a loser and Marty would never have the confidence to continue his music career (and Marty and Jennifer would never have gotten to go up to the lake in the new truck!).</p>
<p>It’s much the same in real life. Analyze you current misfortune and see if it contains the seed of a great victory in your life. Maybe you lost your job and your financial life is in ruins. But perhaps you always wanted to be your own boss and have your own business. Not having money is a terrible thing and you can lose your home, your relationships, and maybe even your mind! But that hardship may be just the thing you needed to inspire you to start your business now. Maybe if you had never lost your job in the first place you would never have tried your business idea. Maybe you would have only talked about it from time to time but never did anything about it. But the seeming misfortune of losing your job and your money forced you to become creative and resilient. It was either that or perish. Don’t perish.</p>
<p>So, don’t give up! Analyze your problem carefully, determine what you can do to change it, be open to new opportunities, and think positive. One day you will win! You have to! But, only if you keep trying. Just remember what the great movie character Rocky Balboa said, “It ain’t about how hard you hit. It’s about how hard you can get hit…how much you can take and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done!” True.</p>
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<p>Article Source:<a target="_blank" href="http://www.articlesbase.com/law-of-attraction-articles/overcome-adversity-gain-strength-and-win-1758882.html" title="Overcome Adversity, Gain Strength, and Win!">http://www.articlesbase.com/law-of-attraction-articles/overcome-adversity-gain-strength-and-win-1758882.html</a></p>
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